the big cozy

trucks and hats

2010-11-05T19:43:00.000-04:00

I did manage to make a dump truck costume for my first born. Three boxes, some crazy glue, a quart of semi-gloss, and a sharpie. He was definitely impressed for about five seconds.

This was the first Halloween I bothered dressing anybody up. Joseph was a baby for his first and second Halloween; last year I had three day old twins so we pretty much took a pass.

Violet's costume was an elf hat (pattern from Bend the Rules Sewing) and a play silk from Joseph's school. I'm not totally clear what she was supposed to be (some sort of pixie or fairy, I suppose) but it was cute.

Poor Harry didn't even get a makeshift costume; he just got another elf hat and some grainy photographs.

The babies cooperated and kept their hats on for hours. Halloween magic, I tell you.

one

2010-10-29T22:12:00.001-04:00

They turned one. We made it. The past year has been incredible and I am so very glad it's over. I'm deciding to just own how much I disliked the experience of having twin babies; I realize that their babyhood is precious/fleeting/etc, but there's no getting around how much it sucked at first (like, for the first ten months) and how miserable we all were. I really like the babies (and the universe) a lot more now that they're beyond the constant crying, constant holding phase. Now we are in the goofy slapstick almost-toddlerhood phase: so much better. They have excellent little personalities that get lovelier every day. Onwards and upwards, my ridiculous babies.

(Photo by this talented lady)

how to use facebook (to make everybody hate you)

2010-10-21T14:10:00.000-04:00

If your status update involves any of the following, you've just alienated a bunch of people:

your brilliant and superior parenting skills (e.g., your three year old's reading ability, the fact that none of your kids eat any refined sugar, etc.)
how other parents are so pitiably stupid for parenting in a way different from your own
any reference whatsoever to vaccination: for, against, or otherwise
hysterical invective against circumcision, baby formula, or nighttime parenting choices
shit-stirring in general

The "hide" button is a magical thing and I use it freely. I expect a certain amount of idiocy in any forum where people aren't interacting face-to-face. But I just do not understand how people can survive a few years of parenthood without being deeply humbled by the inadequacy of whatever ideals they started out with. I'm not even sure that the people who set me off on this little rant really do believe that my kids are forever scarred by my horrible parenting choices. They're probably just looking for some validation from the little choir they're preaching to. But it strikes me as antagonistic and (strangely) competitive and they should most definitely shut right up.

feeding the freezer

2010-10-14T22:17:00.000-04:00

When I'm baking I almost always double the recipe and freeze half. Most baked goods freeze wonderfully. Muffins, quick bread, yeast bread, pie, pie crust, cake, cookies, cookie dough, biscuit and cobbler dough, crumble topping. Everything. I've even had some luck freezing muffin and quick bread batter.

Having a freezer filled with relatively wholesome pies, muffins, etc. really helps in the snack department. And the breakfast department. I bake with whole grains, minimal sugar and heaps of fruit, so I don't worry about the kids (or me) eating too much/too often/whatever. When I taste "normal" pie or cake made with white flour and sugar I'm overwhelmed by the sweetness, reaffirming my belief that my carrot cake is a perfectly reasonable breakfast.

These apple cakes are from Rustic Fruit Desserts. I had some mealy apples that needed to be either baked or put in the compost pile. One went in the freezer, one went in our bellies.

pilgrim dress for silly baby

2010-10-12T19:43:00.000-04:00

I've been shamefully lazy about NaBloWriMo. I think I've missed three days. Pathetic. Last year I managed to post each day despite, you know, giving birth to twins via major abdominal surgery (okay, so I scheduled posts ahead of time--sue me).

I enjoy seeing small children in somber clothing. Dignified, serious clothing makes their foot-eating, food-wearing antics even better.

This dress nearly wound up in the scrap bin due to a buttonhole mishap. While opening up the buttonhole with a seam ripper, my hand slipped and tore a giant hole in the placket. I managed to patch it; you can see the repair job on the top button hole here, but I've decided it's good enough. I didn't cry, curse, throw crockery or yell at my kids. I feel so mature.

This is not my first buttonhole disaster. Either the automatic buttonhole setting on my machine is at fault or this is just one of those things (like pie crust) that I'm just going to routinely screw up despite having decent theoretical knowledge of what needs to be done.

Other than that, I'm pleased with the dress. I made it out of an old skirt I had sewn years ago, before the mysteries of fabric grain had been revealed to me. Perhaps it's the fact that the fabric was essentially free that I was so patient with my buttonhole issue. Hmmmm.

melted crayon success

2010-10-10T18:47:00.000-04:00

Joseph obsessively breaks his crayons into conveniently sized choking hazards that the babies can't get enough of. I was going to throw all those sad little pieces away and pretend they got lost but instead we melted them in some silicone muffin cups. 300 degrees for 5 minutes, that is all it takes. And my muffin cups are still pristine; I had heard that melting crayons can do horrible things to metal muffin cups, so I think silicone is the key to success. Joseph was transfixed throughout the process--he pretty much thinks I'm an alchemist. I have never been so impressive. I think you could probably get better results if you tried to color-coordinate the crayon scraps. Our color scheme here was entirely kid-directed, so you get what you get.

halloween help

2010-10-09T20:58:00.000-04:00

I have no interest in halloween, not this year or any year. My husband and oldest son do not feel the same way, unfortunately. They both think inflatable pumpkin lawn decor is a great idea, and they both have been asking for months about Joseph's costume. Joseph wants to dress up as an excavator or a front end loader, but either he doesn't quite grasp the concept of costumes or he is seriously misjudging my sewing abilities.

I suggested that he and the babies all wear their pointy hats (elf hats made from Bend the Rules Sewing; they take about two seconds to make and look awesome) and we can go as a family as gnomes. This suggestion was greeted with stony silence.

Anybody have any ideas for a quick costume that doesn't involve multiple trips to JoAnn's, fake fur, foam or engineering skills? I'm pretty sure I'll just dress the babies as gnomes and call it a day, but Joseph needs something more exciting.

a (reasonably) happy post

2010-10-07T22:39:00.000-04:00

Conventional wisdom is that twins amuse one another (because we all know how siblings always get along and play together peacefully) but until recently they just smacked and bit one another and cried a lot. When they were in the crib together it was like a baby cage match. Not good. But now they babble at one another and crawl around the house like a pair of baby hooligans, banging on things, tearing apart books and annoying the crap out of their older brother. We're out of the there's always somebody crying so maybe I should just hide in the bathroom and think about how much I dislike my ovaries for making twins and then feel guilty and then cry and then feel incompetent etc etc etc stage and settled into normal, busy-but-manageable family life with two little kids and one not-so-little kid.

Of course, at night it's like having two newborns and a poltergeist, but let's not dwell on that. Joseph now greets strangers with a cheerful "how did you sleep last night?" Because we are sleep obsessed/deprived crazy people in this family.

More preschooler hilarity that must be documented for posterity: yesterday at the grocery store Joseph saw a man wearing an absurd red turtleneck and promptly announced "oh my, you look fancy today, don't you." I don't think I've ever loved another human being more than I did at that moment. At some point we'll have to have a discussion about manners but that can wait.

linen flower dress

2010-10-05T19:52:00.000-04:00

These smock/jumper style dresses were Violet's summer uniform. When I made them, I assumed she'd wear a onesie underneath, but I forgot how sticky and horrible the summer is here. I was glad to have a bunch of light dresses to throw on over a diaper.

The flower on this dress is made from some leftover linen quilt binding. It was two inches wide and then folded in half; I did a basting stitch down the raw edge and then gathered it into a ruffle. I coiled it into a vaguely floral shape while hand stitching it in place from the wrong side; if hand sewing ruffly flowers sounds like a major undertaking, understand that this step took about five minutes. I then hand tacked it onto the dress (another five minutes). I was pretty sure it would turn to shit in the wash, but it held up miraculously well. The laundry gods smiled on me with this one.

three

2010-10-04T22:13:00.002-04:00

My chatty, curious, dreamy, truck-obsessed little boy is now three. Three! Every time we reach a new stage I say to myself "this is the best ever. I will cry a thousand tears when this is over." And then it turns out that the next stage is even lovelier than anything that preceded it.

This was the first time I attempted an actual birthday party, although it was still pretty small and low key. I had to make sure we didn't go to any "real" birthday parties in the weeks leading up to this because I was afraid he'd be disappointed that he didn't have an inflatable ball pit or a cake shaped like a truck or whatever. "But where's my ball pit, mama? It's my birthday, isn't it?" Sob sob sob.

more guilt induced crafting: a penguin

2010-10-03T19:48:00.000-04:00

This fuzzily-photographed penguin is based on this lovely pattern with some details inspired by Harry's penguin-shaped (!) nebulizer. I made it in about half an hour, in classic kid-on-the-lap fashion: raw edges, no ironing, and zero attention to detail. I'd be very satisfied with myself if somebody would play with it, even for a single minute. Alas, most of the toys I make really underwhelm my kids, which is actually to say that they underwhelm Joseph--the babies are content to play with garbage/laundry/lint so I'm not taking their interest as a ringing endorsement.

guilt induced crafting, part one

2010-10-02T22:13:00.000-04:00

During the middle of the summer we were stuck at home a lot because 1) it was a million degrees out, 2) it seemed like at least one of the kids was always contagious with some gross upper respiratory thing and therefore not fit for human company, and 3) I was too sleep deprived to drive anywhere. So we spent a good chunk of the summer inside, going crazy and making memories to share with future therapists.

In an effort to keep the two year old busy and make myself feel like a good mother, I tried to do some really simple sewing projects with him. This bath mitt is from a pattern in the spring 2010 Stitch magazine, although I cut some serious corners. I used an old towel and some fabric scraps. I just eyeballed most of the pieces and did a quick raw edge applique instead of whatever the pattern instructions called for. With a kid on my lap, this took me about 20 minutes.

This was mostly a success: Joseph fed fabric through the machine, cut scraps with his scissors, and stopped emotionally terrorizing the babies for a few moments. I made a dent in my weirdly large pile of old towels (seriously, I could people the world with bath mitt critters) and felt like I accomplished something. Hooray for craft projects that work out.

pictures of my children being beautiful

2010-10-01T22:36:00.000-04:00

So. Hi there. It's been so long since I posted that I can't remember how to properly upload a picture. It took me about 20 minutes to make this picture appear on the damn blog and now I can't even remember why it seemed like such a great picture anyway.

I am so very happy that the summer is over. It was not wonderful. The details are best glossed over, unless you really like hearing about dead pets, diseased gallbladders, a baby who didn't gain weight for three months, a baby with an antibiotic resistant ear infection, and the fact that my husband and I were seemingly in a contest to see who could be in the world's crappiest mood. I've been very busy alternating between feeling sorry for myself and feeling sorry for my kids for having such a basket case for a mother. It's been a laugh riot over here.

This baby does not eat.

But things seem to be improving. The three year old is in school two mornings a week. My gallbladder has stopped actively trying to murder me, and if that means I can never eat dairy, nuts, or eggs again for the rest of my life I can happily make that sacrifice. We're getting to the bottom of the babies' health issues. We planted some trees. I've been making lots of pie. I no longer feel like the house was built over a hell mouth.

This baby does not sleep.

I'm doing NaBloWriMo again this year. See, I have three months of unblogged projects that I can totally milk for 31 days of posts! Maybe I'll even contemplate writing a tutorial.

in which i trash talk my kids

2010-06-22T15:24:00.000-04:00

My children are crappy sleepers. My husband and I are also pretty awful sleepers (he wakes up in the middle of the night to eat/wander/scare the shit out of me; I have never had a normal night's sleep without Ambien CR). I often wonder whether shitty sleeping is genetic or whether it's just that since Scott and I have no idea how to make ourselves sleep we're poorly equipped to help the little ones.

At night, when we peek into Joseph's room we never know what kind of freaky shit we'll find. Will he be passed out on the storage bench like some kind of vagrant at a bus stop? Will he be naked from the waist down? Will he be sprawled on the floor while his trucks are cozily tucked in his bed? He often wakes up in the middle of the night screaming about sharks and robots. It takes him hours of babbling and playing to fall asleep. He almost never sleeps past dawn.

Harry isn't actually a horrible sleeper. He still wakes up to nurse 100,000,000omg000,000wtf times a night, which might be a bit much for an eight month old, but that's relatively manageable. It doesn't take anything especially heroic to get him to fall back asleep and he actually takes two fairly predictable naps a day. In this family, he's a sleeping prodigy.

Violet, however, is a mystery. She only naps in the car or in somebody's lap, which means she barely naps at all. She will take cat naps in a sling but wakes up when she hears so much as a peep from either of her brothers. Transferring her to a flat surface is fraught with peril; if she wakes up, her (loudly voiced) feelings of outrage and betrayal will keep her awake for hours. At night she wants to sleep on my stomach with her head embedded in my neck and her fingers in my eye sockets. I believe that she would be a happier, less needy baby (and that I would be a happier, less insane mother) if she would get more sleep, but I can't figure out how to make that happen without selling the boys or chaining them to a fence or something so that Violet and I can cuddle all day.

All of this is to say: I'm so damn tired. I was hoping that this twin parenting gig would be less stressful by this point, but it most definitely is not. There is always somebody who is not happy. There is always something that should have been done already. Sigh.

training pants

2010-06-08T11:46:00.000-04:00

Last month during a hellish, emotionally deadening trip to Target we gave in to Joseph's demands for "truck underpants." Considering that he had shown zero signs of "potty readiness," I did not have high hopes, but from that point on he's been totally done with diapers except overnight and at naps; occasionally during the daytime he'll surprise us by deciding to pee in some random place but it's in no way a "mistake" or an "accident." More like "science experiment."

So we still need something waterproof for trips out of the house, especially when we're going someplace where a toddler peeing in the corner would be frowned upon. Enter the training pants. I made them from a cloth diaper pattern with the wings/tabs cut off, the side seams sewn up, and the edges bound in fold over elastic. The outer layer is PUL, the inner layer is an old T-shirt, and sandwiched in between is part of an ancient microfiber insert from one of the first cloth diapers I bought when Joseph was a wee baby.

And on the back I appliqued an airplane, just because.

bathing suit remediation

2010-06-04T19:43:00.000-04:00

I would like to be able to throw on a swimsuit and go to the damn beach without feeling like I'm parading around in my underwear. I'm not ordinarily an especially modest person but I feel very exposed in a bathing suit. I think my entire family would appreciate it if the car ride to and from the beach could be spent discussing something other than sexism and the male gaze. I also think I shouldn't have to confront all my body image issues every time I want to go swimming. It kind of kills the fun. And yes yes yes, I know I should be proud and confident and all that, which I kind of am when I'm not expected to appear publicly in my underpants, you know?

I should probably just get myself to the store and buy one of those suits that has trunks instead of a bikini bottom. Instead I made this swim skirt out of half a yard of tricot and some fold over elastic. Combined with a camisole-style bathing suit top I already have, this ought to keep me fairly well covered. We'll see how it works. I suspect that once I hit the water it will float up around my torso, but I can live with that.

I love that fold over elastic is the answer to so many garment construction challenges: waistbands, necklines, gathering and pretty much all aspects of diaper making. A few months ago I bought a few yards in a bunch of colors and it's served me well.

babies in a basket

2010-05-31T23:30:00.000-04:00

Makes me smile every time I see it.

wrap dress (vogue 8379)

2010-05-27T18:07:00.000-04:00

It's another wrap dress, this time in wearable-outside-the-house bamboo/cotton jersey instead of nightmarish blue polyester. I am so proud of myself for making an actual garment that isn't an elastic waist skirt or a potato sack tunic. It's comfortable, flattering, and nursing-friendly. Since it's a wrap, it can be adjusted as I lose weight; since it's made of comfy jersey, it's about as cozy as a bathrobe. There's the unfortunate fact that I tend to forget to readjust the neckline after feeding the babies, so I often have a boob or two semi-exposed, but that happens regardless of what I'm wearing. I should probably make five more dresses just like this, but since it's a miracle I managed to finish this dress at all, I'll probably just wear this one multiple times a week. Yay.

For the record, I deviated from the pattern in a few ways:
1) I left off the sleeves
2) I bound the armholes and neckline using cross grain strips of fabric (instead of making facings)
3) I gathered the shoulders in little pleats to maximize the drapeyness of the bodice

Good grief I look pale in this picture. I think it's the lighting. Or anemia.

side pocket pants

2010-05-25T14:23:00.000-04:00

This is my favorite kind of pocket for kids' pants: a wide U-shape that I make a bit bigger than the child's hand, placed directly over the side seam. The size and placement make it easy for toddler hands to find.

I made these navy linen trousers last summer and they've endured a year in heavy rotation. Right now they need to be worn with the cuff rolled up a few times to disguise the fact that they're too short.

He's my little urchin.

file under dumb stuff people say to me

2010-05-22T10:28:00.001-04:00

If you really want to piss off a mother of twins, suggest that she wear both babies at once. Explain that you saw it on the internet. Use a word like "ergonomic" to make it clear you're an expert. For extra added rage, recommend that she learn to nurse both babies at the same time while wearing them. Point out that if she could master these skills (as you undoubtedly would were you blessed with twins) twins would be no more challenging than a single baby.

This week the babies got their first teeth so tandem babywearing was the only way to keep the screaming at a minimum while leaving me with a free hand to help the toddler use the bathroom (which probably deserves a separate blog post, as well as several poems celebrating this triumph). To be fair, Harry was only moderately fussy, but Violet (who is moderately fussy on the best of days) was a terror. Job satisfaction has been at a low this week, you know?

Totally unrelated: so apparently most Americans pronounce "Harry" and "hairy" the same? Really? My mind is blown. They're different in my (northeastern) accent, as are Mary, marry, and merry. Do you all pronounce them the same? Can I just say how grateful I am that Harry's real name is Henry?

giveaway winner

2010-05-21T01:47:00.000-04:00

The winner is comment number 39. Sara, I just sent you an email asking for your address.

Thanks to everybody for stopping by and offering to give my sad fabric a new home. This was fun, kind of like trick or treating.

I can't wait to fill up the empty space in my drawer with some new stuff...

give away day

2010-05-16T20:32:00.000-04:00

If you like blue and beige, today's your lucky day. I have a boatload of blue and beige fabric that I will never use, and which you can volunteer to take off my hands by leaving a comment on this post. Most of it's quilting weight cotton but there's some home dec weight as well as some mysteries.

Every time I try to organize my fabric I encounter this pile of blue and beige and think to myself: "gee, I should probably make something blue and beige" but then I lose interest halfway through the project (or sooner) because I have no interest in owning anything in those colors. Therefore, I'm also giving away the makings of several projects in various stages of completion, all featuring said blue and beige fabric:

There's a big stack of two or three inch squares which I had intended to make into another bathmat before coming to terms with the fact that I don't want a blue and beige bathmat. There are also some large squares which were probably going to be cocktail napkins. And lastly there are some pieced half square triangles which were going to be coasters much like these (from a long ago giveaway day). And there's one sad solitary coaster that only needs to be stuffed with a square of batting and topstitched.

I also have a stack of truly disreputable prints. Marvel at the ugliness.

In order to become the proud owner of:

the big stack of blue and beige fabric,
various half-completed projects AND
random prints

just leave a comment including whatever information I need to get in touch with you. I'll pick a random winner on Friday, 5/21. I'm not going to ship internationally, so if you're not in the US, sorry.

red dress with peter pan collar

2010-05-15T20:53:00.000-04:00

I started out with a simple enough plan: remaking an old skirt into a dress for the baby. But the next thing I knew I was drafting collars and inserting pleats and what have you. And three days later I had a dress.

I did the collar the same way I did last time except
1) I topstitched the finished collar to make it a bit sturdier and less likely to need a heavy ironing, and
2) I attached the collar to the front of the dress and then bound the neckline edges with bias tape.

I also topstitched the pleats for the same reason.

I haven't hemmed it yet because I'd like this to fit her for a while, so I need to figure out how to do a very deep hem without it looking bulky. This probably means a blind hem. Stupid missing blind hem foot.

apple pocket dress

2010-05-12T10:49:00.004-04:00

apple pocket dress, originally uploaded by thebigcozy.

Well, it started out as a pocket and then I absentmindedly sewed all the way around it, so now it's just an applique. The linen leaves aren't sewed down around the edges (they're just attached with the button) so little hands can amuse themselves by grabbing them.

The blue fabric is a sateen sheet that I've used in other projects. Since sheets are huge and kids' clothing is tiny, one twin sheet set is an infinite resource. I have sheets I've been mining for literally years and there's still enough yardage left to bore me senseless.

Also: linen bias tape, I love you so much. You make my old sheet look so much better.

bloomers

2010-05-10T12:12:00.002-04:00

Linen bloomers and tiny baby feet. I'm reeling from the sweetness.

They stared out as the bloomer pattern from Weekend Sewing in the 6-12 months size, but I had to make them smaller in every dimension to fit my tiny girl, even with her puffy cloth diaper.

The blouse/smock/dress she's wearing is from last summer's sewing bonanza.

Here's what I have lined up for the Kids Clothes Week Challenge:

a few pairs of summer-weight clamdiggers for Joseph. My little man is strangely prim and modest (when he's not running around in the nude, that is); he's been refusing to wear shorts (also: must wear socks) so light weight calf length pants are our compromise.
a few dresses for Violet
more bloomers
some diapers, which really ought to count as clothing since they're all my kids wear for half the day

Poor baby Harry gets nothing new since we have boatloads of Joseph's old clothing and it's not like he cares one way or the other.

curtain fail

2010-05-07T12:12:00.000-04:00

These curtains are every bit as lurid in real life as they are in the photo. My dining room now looks like a place where people go to get murdered and dismembered. The fabric is gorgeous but it looks terrifying with the light shining through it. Are all colored curtains this gruesome? And yet I've see them in magazines and the Anthropologie catalog, so it can't be that insane an idea (but I also see rompers and toeless boots in the Anthro catalog, so perhaps they are not to be trusted). Perhaps I need to line the curtains?

flags, bunting, whatever you call it

2010-05-05T19:44:00.000-04:00

I think I am the last person in the world to make one of these. My attention to detail has reached a new low: I just cut out the triangles freehand and sewed them to a piece of packaged bias tape. I didn't finish any edges or even pink them. I'm a rebel, what can I say.

bunnies

2010-04-28T12:46:00.000-04:00

I used to tease my mother about how she had a cell phone for ten years before learning how to check the voicemail, but after spending the last six weeks futilely poking around my new computer trying to figure out where it's been hiding my pictures, and how to get them from my camera onto the interwebs, I've been humbled. My problem is that I really believe my new computer should behave in exactly the same way as my old one; similarly, I expect every microwave on the planet to operate identically to the one we had when I was in grade school. This is a constant source of disappointment and frustration.

Anyhoo, now I can finally introduce you to Pinky the bunny, made from one of Annie's excellent kits. I had never bought a kit before but I think I will do so again--all the frustrating (sourcing supplies) and tedious (tracing and cutting) parts of crafting are totally taken out of the equation that way. My two (and a half!) year old helper found bunny-making to be very rewarding and has requested that we make Pinky some friends, ASAP.

This squishy fellow (also named Pinky) was made from this super tutorial. The fact that I was able to assemble nearly all the supplies and get the rabbit almost entirely done without getting up from my computer tells you 1) how satisfyingly easy this project is and 2) the prevailing state of disarray in my house. I have so many stray baby socks I could people the world in squishy bunnies, which I just might.

staying right where I am

2010-04-10T12:15:00.001-04:00

OK, I alluded to this before, but I seriously need to stop leaving the house for a while. The main reason is that I might murder the next person who lets their gross kid sneeze near (or on!) my babies. The babies have each had five colds in the five months they've been alive. When their noses get stuffy, they won't eat; this means they become even more distressingly underweight. Violet is ten pounds; Harry is fourteen pounds and he's still so small he's off the growth charts, so that gives you an idea of how tiny Violet is. We've all been sick this week, but she's had it the worst and I've decided that keeping her healthy has got to be the priority around here. She needs to get strong, and her parents need a chance to recover from five months of taking care of three sick kids and being pretty constantly sick ourselves. I feel awful that Joseph won't get to go to playdates, but he's going to have to take one for the team.

The other reason I need to just stay put is that going anywhere with three kids is a circus. Even just getting everybody in the car to go to the park is really stressful, and that's only followed by the babies screaming for most of the car ride. And then there is the dumb shit total strangers feel the need to say to me. "Looks like you've got you're hands full there, ha ha." Unless the next words out of your mouth are "how can I help" or "I guess I should keep my germy hands to myself," you ought not to be talking to me. And then there's the helpful advice ("can't you breastfeed them both at once?" "can't you put them both in a sling?") which I could respond to rationally if I weren't a total mess, but as things stand all I can do is fume and feel judged.

I am really tired, sick, and run down so this sounds more negative than I mean it to be. Most people I know, even random acquaintances, are helpful, supportive, tactful, kind, and awesome. And I am so grateful for that. (And I seriously need to mention how fantastically helpful my parents are. We would be so screwed without them around.)

right back atcha

2010-03-27T14:57:00.002-04:00

Here Harry is doing his best wise guy impersonation; perhaps he's discussing the merits of various pizzerias or telling you which horse to bet on. Regardless, Violet is very concerned for her brother.

(Instead of writing about what's actually on my mind these days, which is how shitty an experience it is to run errands with my kids, and how much it makes me hate the universe and everybody in it, I am going to post pictures of the babies behaving adorably. When I can come up with something nice to say I will say it.)

best picture ever

2010-03-26T14:42:00.000-04:00

That's Violet. She's pretty damn pleased with herself, sitting at the table like such a lady. I made that sweater and she'd better enjoy it because I don't foresee ever being able to have the time to knit a garment again. Whenever there is a convergence of free time and creative energy, I sew something for own damn self. And then I can't get anybody to take my picture so I can't even show off on the interwebs.

soda bread

2010-03-17T14:55:00.000-04:00

This is not quite soda bread. It's more like a cake with the essence of soda bread. Whatever it is, it's moist and delicious and I'm all for it. I used this recipe except I used part whole wheat flour and skipped the caraway seeds and the butter/sugar topping. We ate it too quickly so now I have another in the oven, this time with a bit less sugar and butter instead of oil. Because I cannot leave well enough alone.

In unrelated news, my new computer is still causing me grief. My pictures are all over the damn place and I can't get them arranged in a single file in Picasa. I almost cried, then I moped away and ate half the soda bread/cake.

fracking fungi

2010-03-09T14:45:00.000-05:00

I just ripped up 20 octopus stinkhorns from my garden. They are without a doubt the worst smelling things I've ever encountered (rotten meat + vomit + skunk); I very nearly threw up while digging them out. Ugh. The worst is that there will be more of them out there in a few days. If this is how I need to spend the precious minutes of each afternoon when the kids are all asleep, I really need fewer hobbies. I want to pave over the garden or possibly set fire to it. I feel like I can still smell it, so now I need to go wash my hair while pretending I don't have three crying children.

learning curve

2010-03-08T17:08:00.000-05:00

We got a new computer because our old one was diseased and geriatric. Since I rely heavily on my browser to remember my passwords, getting a new computer is like joining the witness protection program. None of the sites I frequent know who the hell I am, and I can't remember my user ID let alone my password, so it's all very disorienting. My mind apparently cannot process the fact that the new keyboard is set up a bit differently than the old one; I feel like I'm typing with my feet. And since I'm also bouncing a baby or trying to wrangle a toddler I just give up and read a book.

Also filed under "annoying developments" is the fact that Joseph finally figured out how to climb out of his crib. He's two and a half, which I realize is a long time to stay in a crib anyway, but he's such a troubled sleeper that being in an enclosed space really helped him. To wit: now that he is free range he sleeps curled up on the floor in front of his bedroom door. And by "sleeps" I mean "passes out unconscious for a few minutes at a time." The other day during naptime he stripped himself nude and peed on the carpet. This is not a child who knows how to put himself to sleep. So he's exhausted and cranky, and his parents are even more exhausted and cranky than they were before the criblessness.

And somehow in the middle of all this the babies have turned into actual little people with distinct personalities. Four months! I have loads of pictures but I still need to figure out how to transfer them from the old computer and get them off my camera which is what I think I'll do tonight instead of making dinner.

peter pan collar blouse remake

2010-02-22T13:30:00.000-05:00

This used to be a long sleeved oxford style shirt (like this). I bought it in 2003 (!) to wear to work and I recently found it in the garage boxed up with other random crap. It fits very well (which makes me wonder how the hell loose I used to wear my clothes) but I'm not crazy about that style of shirt so I decided to play mad scientist and figure out how to make it wearable. I hacked off the sleeves and used the sleeve fabric to make a new collar.

I wish I had taken pictures of what I did because then I could have a tutorial, which would have been a first, but it turns out that Gertie has promised a peter pan collar tutorial later this week and she actually knows what she's doing. But in case anybody's interested in my rinky dink method of making and attaching a peter pan collar, here's what I did:

I lowered the neckline (I eyeballed it). Then I lay the shirt flat and traced the new neckline onto a piece of paper. I drew a peter pan collar around this neckline tracing, and added seam allowances on the outside. Voila! A peter pan collar pattern piece. I cut out two collar pieces: for the upper collar I used the discarded sleeve fabric, and for the undercollar I used white broadcloth that was left over from some old forgotten project. I sewed these two collar pieces together (right sides together) along the outside, clipped the curves, turned and pressed.

To attach the collar to the shirt I sewed the edge of the pink (upper) part of collar to the inside of the shirt (right side of the collar facing the wrong side of the shirt); then flipped it to the outside. I then turned under the edge of the white undercollar 1/4" and topstitched it in place. None of the stitching is visible from the outside.

Here you can see the topstitching on the undercollar:

And this is the inside of the shirt:

This is not the slickest way to attach a collar but it works for me.

tulip skirt

2010-02-15T12:30:00.000-05:00

I wanted to make myself something in order to compensate for the fact that we've had a nutty few weeks. The babies have had growth spurts / feeding frenzies, Joseph has been in an evil mood due to some new molars, and I've had a toothache/sinus infection/spate of new allergies. Sometimes it's easier to get through a rough afternoon when you have a distracting project to focus your energy on: you pop a few motrin, put the homicidal toddler in front of a truck DVD, and nurse one baby at a time (at the sewing machine).

This is Jenny Gordy's tulip skirt pattern from the Winter 2008 issue of Stitch magazine. I made it in what fabric.com called a cotton/rayon faille, but it feels like school uniform quality polyester to me. At $1.99 a yard I'm not complaining. I'm not delighted about the fit; I have to stand up damn straight to avoid some belly vs. waistband conflict. I'm wearing it today and I'm exhausted from the effort. One of the benefits of always having a baby in a sling is that I can slouch and slump and let my poor belly go all over the place and nobody's the wiser. It's kind of interesting to be focused on my stomach instead of my butt as my source of angst. Hello, middle age, I can see you from here!

Anyway.

The skirt went together easily with very few modifications (an inch or so longer, some extra topstitching) but I had a bit of an epiphany while cursing over my machine's inability to make it through one effing buttonhole without getting stuck: I could have installed ten invisible zippers in the time it took make the buttonholes, sew on the buttons, and hand sew the wretched hooks and eyes at the waistband. I really need to man up and get over my issues with zippers.

kitchen mats

2010-02-09T13:41:00.000-05:00

I have this lurking feeling that I've already written about this before. I finished this mat literally days before the babies were born (when I was young and carefree) and it's been a bit of a blur since then so bear with me.

This is basically a bath mat, but it lives on the kitchen counter next to the sink for draining dishes. We have a dish washer but the pots, pans, mixing bowls, and a few other things still have to be hand washed. I'd much rather just let them air dry than go to the effort of wiping them, but dish racks are pretty useless where pots and pans are concerned. So we had been letting everything drain onto a depressing soggy dish towel. This mat replaces the towel and is better looking and more absorbent. And when it's not in use it still covers up part of my hideous counters. You should probably go make one right now.

I also made one for the floor in front of the sink but that's not nearly as important.

I'm very pleased with the method I used to make these. I pieced together the top, then sewed it directly to a piece of old towel, right side up, quilting it as if the towel were the quilt back. Then I bound it like a quilt. The very dense horizontal quilting lines (about half an inch apart) and the thick linen binding make it much sturdier and more substantial than this mat. This is definitely my new preferred method for making bath mats, because you know we should all take a stand on that issue.

vogue 8379 and the fabric from hell

2010-02-06T14:31:00.001-05:00

I definitely should have known better than to have anything to do with bright blue polyester jersey, but it was only $1.99 a yard (fabric.com) and I really needed to attempt the Vogue 8379 wrap dress that the internet loves so damn much. I desperately want to make peace with knit fabric, and I have almost no warm weather clothing that fits and is nursing-friendly, so the time seemed right.

This was mostly a success. The fit of the dress is pretty excellent; so that's not a problem. The seaming of the knit fabric was also not a problem, thanks to a ball point needle and a stretch stitch on my machine. I even managed to do something with the armholes in order to avoid sleeves (because I get overheated just thinking about polyester sleeves).

The problem was the hem: in short, it looks like shit. I was all set to do a twin needle hem, which is what the internet told me I needed to do, but the needles kept skipping stitches and in general leaving a hot mess all over the fabric. This is because the twin needles aren't ballpoint and this very slippery, snaggy fabric needs a ballpoint needle, period. I tried out the twin needle hem on a bunch of friendlier knits from the rag bag and it worked fine, so I really feel okay with blaming this particular fabric.

I'm not too broken up about it because I truly doubt that I'd wear a bright blue polyester dress out of the house no matter how awesome the hem was. As a dry run/first draft/confidence building experience, this was a success, and I have plans to make wrap dresses out of some brown bamboo jersey and orange cotton jersey.

my manifesto

2010-02-04T16:02:00.000-05:00

Taking care of the people in this house is my priority. Not cleaning. Not cooking. Not laundry. Holding a baby, feeding a baby, walking back and forth with a sad baby, reading the entire internet while nursing two babies through a growth spurt...even if that's all I do all day, it still counts as getting something done. Lounging on the sofa with my toddler is also getting something done. Taking a nap is most certainly getting something done; napping with a baby is getting two things done at once. If it's a choice between making dinner and having a happy quiet afternoon, I'm not making dinner; frozen pizza is five dollars well spent. Television isn't the greatest thing in the world for a toddler, but it's a lot better than any alternative I can come up with for those times when both babies are insane and I need to help them through that somehow. Likewise, it's totally not ideal for one of the babies to spend half the day in the swing, but when there isn't a workable alternative then that's the way it has to be and there's no use getting too upset about it. Let me re-emphasize that for my own sake: it does not matter how much something sucks (Joseph doesn't have enough playdates, the dogs spend all day outside, a baby is sometimes left to cry while I deal with somebody else's needs, the bathrooms are gross, etc) because if it's the best we're capable of then that's all there is.

OK, now I feel better.

fabric lust

2010-02-03T14:43:00.000-05:00

The one on the left is one of the prints from My Folklore by Lecien. The one on the right is from Heather Ross's Far Far Away. Last month I was feeling sorry for myself so I treated myself to half a yard of each. I had been coveting them but 1) I didn't have a project in mind 2) they're not cheap, especially the Heather Ross and 3) the local fabric shops don't carry either one. I'm still not sure what I'll do. I'm thinking of putting some in embroidery hoops and hanging them on the wall like I'm always seeing all over the blogoverse; possibly I'll make a pillow for the couch. The rest can be napkins, because half a yard is a lot of fabric when all you're making is doo dads for the house. But curtains? You need a zillion yards. Which is why we still have crappy blinds.

shirt improvement

2010-01-29T09:53:00.013-05:00

I wore this shirt exactly once, hated it, shoved it to the back of my closet, got hugely pregnant, and forgot about it. Last month I reshuffled the contents of my closet, burned all the maternity clothing and danced on their ashes, and rediscovered this shirt.

Here's what I don't like about it:

The tunic shape does nothing for me. I'm flat chested (apart from my temporary nursing boobs) and pear shaped. This means that a tunic creates a very disappointing silhouette: a wide rear end hanging out from the bottom of an empty bag. Not cute. I need a fitted top; either a knit or an aggressively tailored woven, that way the silhouette is more hourglassy and less dumpy.
Long sleeved wovens irritate me: I cook, change diapers, clean, dig in the sandbox, putter in the garden, and wash my hands. A lot. I don't want to have to roll up my sleeves every time I do this. Long sleeved t-shirts and sweaters can just be pushed up; wovens, not so much.
The neckline is too high. I feel choked and I can't nurse the babies.

Here's what I do like about it:

the fabric--a wonderfully soft cotton lawn, even though florals are not usually my favorite
the fact that I made it myself (and did a pretty fine job with the bias tape, if I say so myself)

So I cut the whole damn thing apart and remade it. I lowered the neckline, opened up the placket so I can nurse the babies without completely disrobing, added another button, shortened the sleeves, added back darts, ditched the back ties, tapered the sides to fit my waist, and created a flared hem. I'm still not thrilled with the results (I think it needs cap sleeves, and something's wrong with the neckline, maybe?). But now at least I'll wear it, so that's an improvement.

While doing this I marked all the changes on the original pattern, so in theory I'll be able to duplicate this on other shirts that need fixing. Or I can just donate my old shirts to goodwill and spend my precious sewing time making new stuff. To hell with upcycling until I have more time on my hands to experiment.

I was rereading the post about the original tunic and noted my casual reference to "fetuses." I was so innocent then.

sanity

2010-01-27T22:27:00.000-05:00

Things are improving here: the babies are sleeping for longer stretches of time, the weather's been good enough for Joseph to spend some quality time with his sandbox, we found a part time babysitter, and we've all learned to appreciate toddler television in moderation. I've even been able to keep the house a bit tidier, which in turn makes me even saner. I need to keep that in mind the next time I'm super stressed and crazy: I am happier when the house is tidy and there aren't mounds of sand and plastic dinosaurs scattered everywhere.

Here are totally unrelated pictures. Violet's wearing a navy corduroy jumper I made. She has a goofy smile. Harry has a goofy everything. He's yawning, in case that isn't clear.

Joseph is modeling the green vest I knit while on bed rest.

I was trying to get him to pose a la the Sartorialist. Didn't quite happen, but I think he looks dashing.

vegan cookies for rich people

2010-01-19T10:52:00.000-05:00

Almond butter + maple syrup + whole wheat flour. Pricey, but delicious and not horrible for you. Variations on this theme have been added to the weekly baking rotation.

This recipe was adapted from the treasure trove of wholesome goodness that is 101 Cookbooks. The original recipe is wonderful, but since peanut butter and I don't always get along, I've been using almond butter, which definitely adds to the cost. Other changes I've tried:

I've been adding combination of random ground nuts (walnuts, cashews, almonds--whatever I have on hand) to make up the cup of nut butter called for in the recipe.
Tahini works too, which I discovered after raiding my pantry in search of something nut-like to use.
I've tried cutting the amount of sweetener in half, but this makes the cookies too dry and crumbly unless you add some water.
I've also tried substituting some turbinado sugar instead of turning to a life of crime in order to afford enough maple syrup; this works but again you have to add water to compensate for the dryness.
And just because I cannot leave good enough alone, I've substituted rolled oats for some of the flour. You have to use about twice the volume of oats as you would flour. I just add oats until the dough seems like it's the right consistency.

I've thoroughly corrupted the original recipe, but I swear it still tastes good.

haikus for my husband

2010-01-14T13:01:00.000-05:00

You're right. It does suck
When all three kids are screaming.
Good job noticing!

And another:

You say I look tired
I wonder why that could be--
I don't have a "job."

I'm feeling bitchy and unappreciated today. I'll be a better person tomorrow.

holiday bread

2010-01-09T10:28:00.000-05:00

Panettone is one of those things I never understood until I reached years of discretion--it seems to be a dessert, yet it contains zero percent chocolate? No thanks. Then you become a grown up lady and you realize that it's not dessert, it's breakfast. A breakfast that happens to contain three sticks of butter and a dozen eggs and a goodly amount of sugar. It's times like these I thank the DNA fairy that I have no problems with cholesterol.

I'm so happy that that the geniuses behind Artisan Bread in Five Minutes a Day have posted their excellent panettone recipe online. The only real change I make to the recipe is to boil the water and soak the dried fruit in it, and then add the fruit-water mixture when the recipe says to add the water. This makes the fruit almost dissolve into the bread. Also, I don't have special panettone pans so I just use plain old loaf pans.

Stale panettone makes killer french toast and bread pudding.

patchwork goodness

2010-01-05T11:19:00.000-05:00

A coaster and a trivet:

I'm digging the scrappy look of this trivet and coaster (even though I think I must have been drinking when I put the binding on the trivet--what the hell?? Do I not have a ruler? Or eyes?). Both are foundation pieced, meaning I sewed the scraps directly to the batting, one scrap at a time. I also quilted as I went. This process is very fast and intuitive (read: no advance planning) which exactly what I'm in the mood for lately.
Once I finished making the patchwork square for the trivet, I backed it with a towel and bound it like a quilt. For the coaster, I sewed a square of linen to the patchwork top, right sides together, then turned and topstitched. It lives with these coasters and some new ones I made using the fabrics from the table runner.
I got the idea for foundation piecing directly to the batting and quilting as you go from this book. It also has lots of lovely square patchwork, and a few bags that make my heart skip a beat or two but which I will never make because they don't hold seventeen diapers and god knows how many toy construction vehicles (and also because you don't need a bag if you never go out).

resolutions

2009-12-30T12:06:00.000-05:00

I haven't done this in a few years but I'm feeling ambitious, so here goes:

In 2010 I want to:

get out of the house more days than not (i.e., four days a week) even if it's just to garden or take a walk. Between the babies, bed rest, a boiling hot summer and crippling morning sickness, 2009 was not a great year for leaving the house. It was, however, a wonderful year for cultivating my nascent agoraphobia, which I really need to nip in the bud.
keep up the garden, at least to the extent that most of the stuff growing in it is not weeds
make a real article of clothing for myself (meaning something with a zipper or buttonholes).
continue avoiding unnecessary purchases. Aside from about $350 on yarn and fabric and $100 on books and magazines, I don't think I spent much money on non-necessities in 2009--with the understanding that nice soap and new underwear are sometimes necessities. Now I just need to get my husband on board.
make curtains. The blinds we have now are ugly, hard-to-clean strangulation hazards. They need to go.

And I think that's enough. Note that most of these items are thing that I enjoy doing (like gardening and sewing) but which I need to carve out time for. I'm not even going to kid myself by resolving to do anything I don't enjoy. But just for the record here's a partial list of things I really ought to do in 2010 but probably won't: go to the dentist, exercise, finish all the craft projects I start, speak French with Joseph, do something about the 401K from my old job, write more thank you notes, eat ethically, blah blah blah.

can you stand it?

2009-12-27T10:07:00.000-05:00

It's a picture frame ornament intended for newlyweds. Much better with babies. Got the idea from somebody posting in the multiples forum at mothering.com.

the tree

2009-12-22T21:15:00.000-05:00

While Joseph may be the mellowest, sweetest two year old ever, the child does not understand limits, boundaries, or the concept of "don't touch that." "No" means nothing to him unless it's coming out of his own mouth ("No pants, mama! No pants, no pants, no pants!"). Therefore, our Christmas/holiday/solstice/yule/winter tree is 1) tethered to the wall, and 2) only decorated with ornaments he can play with. I love when other parents tell me that their kids don't mess with their tree because they were told not to. It makes me feel like I'm raising a jungle beast or a sociopath. These are the same people who manage to have table lamps, which is something I can't even imagine at this point. Fortunately, bed rest this fall gave me plenty of time to knit up some ornaments that can be played with, chewed on, "shared" with the babies and thrown at the windows.

I've already written about these lights.

The popcorn and cranberry garland is also from the same knitpicks ornament kit, and it makes me happy whenever I walk past the tree.

You can see that there's an infestation of tiny elves. The pattern calls them "korknisse" which I suppose means cork people, but Joseph calls them elf men so that's what they are. This is possibly the best stash busting project ever; it uses hardly any yarn in any weight you want. Some of the elves have face tattoos, which I think means they've killed someone, but I feel awkward asking.

And some stuff I made last year.

I made the tree skirt (wool felt; the leaves are machine appliqued) when Joseph was a newborn, a fact that blows my mind and makes me think that having one baby must have been like a vacation compared to how thing's are now, even though I keep telling people that having twin babies isn't all that different from having one. I must be delirious with fatigue.

Happy holidays, people!

gingerbread men

2009-12-20T17:00:00.000-05:00

I used this recipe. Something's wrong with it--maybe too much flour relative to the amount of fat. I usually feel like a fraud when I blame a recipe for tasting off because it's not like I can ever be sure that my execution isn't to blame, but I made this recipe twice and both times it was disappointing. Time to find another recipe.

We did have fun making them, though. Joseph has his own rolling pin and he really enjoys pressing down the cookie cutter and watching the shape emerge. We didn't decorate them because that's a bit much for a two year old. The first batch came out chalky looking, so we put a milk wash on the second batch (pictured above) to make them shiny. When we cook together Joseph is in charge of applying egg and milk washes and greasing the pan--he uses a silicone pastry brush and paints away. Greasing a pan can take half an hour that way. Hooray for that.

recipe card folders

2009-12-19T17:42:00.000-05:00

My usual style of gift giving is to put it off until the last minute and then have to pay last minute express shipping on something really boring from Harry & David. Sometimes I forget to buy anything at all, which at least keeps everybody's expectations pretty low in the future. This fortunate because this year nobody's going to be exactly wowed by what they get from me--we're only giving presents to immediate family (parents & siblings) and we're only giving little trinkety types of things--a couple of books and these recipe card holders.

I followed this tutorial for making the recipe card folders and it was super easy and didn't take up much fabric. I enjoyed mixing and matching some of the of the random fat quarters that I had bought this summer without any project in mind. I especially love that brown floral print on the outside of the top folder--it's a print I'd probably never use in my own home or clothing, but I think it's so pretty so I enjoyed working with it.

The project instructions called for lightweight fusible interfacing, which I still find gross and hard to work with, but it does give the folder some body. I actually wound up using two layers of interfacing (except on the pockets) because it was still too floppy with one layer.

I cut out the interfacing to the size of the fabric minus the seam allowances so that way there would be less bulk at the edges of the folder. This is a tip I picked up somewhere on the interwebs and need to file away for all future interfacing-related adventures.

And inside the folder are recipe cards (except for one person, whose recipe collection has progressed far beyond the confines of any folder, and who will instead receive these neat post its in her folder).

carrot cookies

2009-12-14T22:30:00.000-05:00

Not much eating seems to happen at mealtime these days. Joseph seemingly goes for days without eating anything other than a few spoonfuls of yogurt and half an almond. My husband is a grazer, so he snacks all day and then spends dinner avoiding vegetables. And while I've for the most part been able to eat dinner since Scott is always around to hold a baby, for the rest of the day I only eat things that can be grabbed with one hand and eaten standing up.

Since Scott and I have both been subsisting on snacks (and Joseph on magical toddler fairy dust) I figure I should just accept the fact and make some healthy goodies instead of eating a $5 box of Fig Newmans every day and then hating myself. And while I try not to cater to Joseph's gastronomical whims, it can only be a good thing if there's something palatable and healthy at hand when the spirit moves him to eat.

These carrot cookies fit the bill: they're yummy, but not so irresistible that they're going to disappear in an hour, and they include vegetables, whole grains, and protein while totally avoiding refined sugar and animal products. I used this recipe, except that 1) I didn't have enough maple syrup so I made up the difference with some fruit-sweetened jam, and 2) I used canola oil instead of coconut oil. And I threw in some raisins because why not? Next time I need to grind the nuts super fine because my husband won't eat anything with visible nuts and will instead buy overpriced candy bars from the vending machine at work; also I should make the carrots tinier because Joseph systematically dissected each cookie to get "carrot out of there, mama".

six weeks

2009-12-09T22:15:00.000-05:00

The babies are six weeks old today. Crazy. Harry's about nine and a half pounds, the little piglet. Violet's a little over eight. Harry is fiercely hungry; if his eyes are open, he's hungry; if his eyes are closed, he's still probably hungry--he roots around in his sleep. He's perfectly happy as long as he's eating; Violet meanwhile is perfectly happy as long as she's being held. Those two conditions pretty much tell you everything you need to know about the last six weeks of life here. I'm worn out but it's not as harrowing as I thought it would be. Sometimes entire minutes pass without either of them needing me, and then I can fold six loads of laundry and take a shower.

Here Violet's modeling a mama-made outfit. The diapers are working out well but I can't say we're getting much use yet out of anything else I made. During my prenatal crafting frenzy, I seem to have forgotten the crucial fact that babies wear pajamas. Or swaddling blankets. Anything else is too much effort to put on and keep in place. Once she starts sitting up a bit then maybe the dresses and sweaters will make more sense.

And here's the big brother, pretending to be a baby. This isn't regression so much as it is hamming it up for the camera. What you can't see in the picture is that he's chewing on the pacifier like it's a cigar and pretending to cry ("wah wah wah"). The more Scott and I laughed, the more he amped it up. I love this new phase of toddlerhood. He cracks me up. Sometimes when he does something he finds especially amusing he says "funny! ha ha!" I love that. What idiot came up with the idea of the terrible twos? So wrong.

holiday pictures

2009-12-06T17:28:00.000-05:00

This afternoon we had a Christmas miracle: we managed to get everybody clean, awake, and reasonably content in the same room for about 90 seconds while we took a picture for the holiday card.

Sigh. But consider the runner up, in which Joseph is sticking his behind in the camera and Violet is screaming.

That makes the first one look like Annie Liebowitz took it.

Later on, Joseph drew wheels on the bottom of the Christmas tree:

He explained that the Christmas tree is now a crane. Good for it.

If I haven't sung the praises of blackboard paint yet, let me do so right now: it is the shit. Go buy some. We used it on a little corner of the living room and it keeps the child busy for longer than you'd think.

another sweater (and blogger hates me)

2009-12-02T21:57:00.000-05:00

This is the second Liesl I've made for myself. This time I used thinner yarn than what's recommended in the pattern, but I like the effect--it's a bit lacier. I'm so happy with the Liesl pattern.

I love the yarn I used. It's a soft and gorgeous alpaca-silk blend. Even though it sheds like mad I'll definitely use it again the next time I knit myself (or another adult) a winter weight sweater. I love the color too--it's not a true brown, but rather a reddish cinnamon. In the context of my 90% brown winter wardrobe, this counts as some real pizazz.

I made the sleeves fairly long. I feel like every fall I have to re-answer the question: can I wear a long sleeved t-shirt with a 3/4 length sleeved sweater? And every year I answer "sure!" and then wonder whether I look like some kind of weird scarecrow or a crazy hobbit or something. So now I have a sweater that goes a little beyond my wrist and I can feel proportionate.

(I made this before the babies were born, when I was bored stupid on bedrest. I feel like I need to mention that. But I sewed the button on last week! Hooray for me!)

Edited to add: blogger hates me and originally published this two weeks in the past, instead of yesterday. That, or I time travelled. Now I've reposted it.

gratitude, but no pictures

2009-11-25T23:09:00.001-05:00

Why no pictures? Because I can't find the cord that connects the camera to the computer. It probably has been pressed into service as a leash or a lasso by a certain junior member of this household. Or possibly I misplaced it while tidying up in a sleep deprived fugue state. Either way, I'm sure it will turn up eventually, and then I can feel properly guilty about not having any decent pictures of the babies and Joseph together. What I'm going to use as this year's Christmas picture is anybody's guess. (For that matter, what I'm going to do about Christmas presents is also anybody's guess, but let's start small.)

Anyway, gratitude:

I'm grateful, really really grateful for help from family and friends. I get sort of dizzy and almost black out when I start to imagine what the past few months would have been like without my parents being around to take care of Joseph. And as for all the people who were there with kind words and generous offers of help ...I'm always amazed when it turns out that people give a damn about me (because i'm awesome like that).

Of course I'm grateful for having the world's most charming two year old, who now spontaneously tells me that he loves me and that he's mama's little bunny (!). I'm grateful for two healthy babies, and that all the bad things I wouldn't let myself think about didn't happen. And I'm beyond grateful for my husband.

Wouldn't this post have been so much better if there were a picture of a bunch of smiling babies? Oh well. Happy thanksgiving!

major success

2009-11-20T15:48:00.000-05:00

We've had some major successes this week, starting with a trip to the grocery store during which the worst thing that happened was a four year old sneezing on Violet. We can all thank Zoloft for the fact that the four year old (and her mother) did not find her life cut short right in the middle of the Whole Foods dairy aisle.

Another big deal is that I've spent much more time with Joseph and the babies at home, without my parents or Scott taking Joseph for part of the day. This has not been fabulous (life with two babies and a toddler makes the previous 31 years of my life feel like an extended vacation) but neither has it been the nightmare I anticipated. Joseph is easily amused, Violet sleeps like she's drugged, and even Harry spends the greater part of the day unconscious as long as I nurse and bounce him every twenty minutes or so. I'm pretty much able to meet everybody's food/laundry/hygiene needs, and even do a little bit of knitting and sewing (in two minute intervals, but still). I feel super accomplished as long as I hold myself to this new, realistic standard and don't try to do anything insane like clean the bathtubs. I want to cry when I look at my neglected garden, but maybe this spring I'll do something about it. Maybe.

pictures of children who do not sleep

2009-11-16T16:41:00.000-05:00

After what looked like a promising start it turns out the babies are just as crap sleepers as the rest of their family. Harry can't seem to sleep for more than 20 minutes at stretch, and when he wakes up Violet joins him (whether out of sympathy or perversion is not clear).

Yes, they're holding hands. They do that. I need to focus on moments like these so I feel less tempted to break the law at 4:30 am when I've gotten a grand total of 45 minutes of sleep. I think I must have grown as a person since Joseph was a newborn because I feel much more sane and accepting about the sleep situation. Or perhaps two years of Joseph-induced sleeplessness has just crushed my spirit.

This picture was taken at 5:00 in the morning, which is Joseph's new time to rise and shine. My wonderful and patient husband, who has taken over mornings with Joseph while I attempt to scrape together a few nonconsecutive hours of sleep, killed some time by taking the winter accessories out of the closet and letting Joseph make himself all fancy. I like this picture because it looks like he and Indiana are waiting for the bus: no eye contact, bodies pointed away from one another, plenty of space between them. This is unusual because in all the other pictures from that morning they appear to be trying to lick one another's teeth.

bath time

2009-11-12T15:16:00.000-05:00

The other day I decided it was high time for the babies to have a proper bath. Harry had developed a habit of peeing in his own face and spitting up in Violet's, and I really did not feel that a damp washcloth was equal to the situation.

Here's what I learned:

In order to successfully bathe two babies at once, at least one of the following elements must be present:

a second adult
sufficient head control on the part of the babies
ninja reflexes

Otherwise it's a bit harrowing.

The babies enjoyed it thoroughly. I would have taken a picture if I hadn't been too busy clinging onto their slippery little selves for dear life. Instead, we have a picture (taken by my mother, who arrived at my house at just the right moment) of them wrapped up in a towel after their bath.

That's Violet on the left, wearing her trademark expression of disdain, and Harry, looking like a tired alien.

success!

2009-11-10T11:06:00.000-05:00

Harry, at less than two weeks old and just under six pounds, has achieved total thumb-sucking mastery.

Violet and I are thrilled because this probably means our various parts will not be used for 24/7 comfort sucking. The poor girl was being devoured by her brother. Not ok. Although I kind of wish I had taken a picture of him sucking her elbow, and her expression of distaste.

a bullet pointed list

2009-11-07T14:40:00.000-05:00

Oh, how I used to rail against bullet pointed lists when I was teaching English composition. I had a whole mini-lecture in which I explained that 90% of the time bullet points are embarrassingly illiterate ("here are some interesting things you might not know about bee keeping / my grandmother / gender inequity in the Indian subcontinent") or are transparent efforts to avoid transforming scattered ideas into a coherent thought ("here's some stuff I have in my notes, but I've already reached the page minimum so I won't bother trying to shape this into a paragraph").

I have no idea why that popped into my brain today. I actually really like lists, especially on the interwebs, where a bullet pointed list is like a freaking petrarchan sonnet compared to most everything else.

Anyway.

The boob situation, OMG. You can see them from outer space. They could be in an Aerosmith video (the rest of me, not so much). After 31 years of unremarkability, my bosom has found its calling. Everything in my house in covered in leaked breast milk. You'd think that nursing two babies would mean less leakage, less oversupply. Not so. All that supply & demand stuff the breastfeeding experts talk about must be true (i.e., the babies demand more, I supply more, etc etc etc until there are puddles of the stuff everywhere you look).
The diapers I made are working brilliantly. However, if my husband does not start folding back the laundry tabs I am going to do something drastic. A semi-related anecdote: last month Scott and my dad were changing Joseph's diaper (because this is a job for two strong men), and I overheard Scott telling my dad "you've got to fold the tabs back or you'll get us both killed!" Yes, ruining my diapers is more than your life is worth. TAKE HEED.
Joseph remains pretty mellow in the face of the baby invasion. I'd like to believe that this has something to do with my excellent parenting skills, but probably it's just because 1) he's an awesome kid, and 2) my parents and Scott are taking him on daily adventures. Or maybe, 3) he's saving it all up for his future therapists. Here's a somewhat gratuitous photo of him stalking a turtle on one of his outings with Scott:
I gained sixty five pounds during the pregnancy. Now somebody tell me why yesterday, nine days after giving birth, I put myself through the hell of trying on several pieces of non-maternity clothing in my closet. Do I hate myself that much? We need a rule that when you have a baby, somebody comes into your house and takes away all your pre-pregnancy clothing until you're about ten weeks postpartum. Or possibly forever.

an update

2009-11-04T22:30:00.000-05:00

Yes, that's actually how they sleep, all cuddled together. Even at night when I'm in bed with them, they tend to face one another rather than me. Very sweet.

Things are going well. Very well, in fact. By some miracle I'm getting almost 7 hours of sleep daily, despite the fact that I spend close to 16 hours a day breastfeeding. The babies are very sleepy so it takes them a long time to nurse, and I haven't quite mastered feeding them both at once; also they need to eat every two hours because it's so important that they keep gaining weight. That all adds up to breastfeeding around the clock, which is fine by me since I'm just thrilled that I haven't had to use any formula or do any pumping and I can keep it simple: babies, mama, cuddles.

Joseph is taking this all wonderfully. I am so relieved. He's spending a lot more time with his grandparents and father so I can take care of the babies, and when he does see me the babies are always on me, but that doesn't seem to make him jealous. He likes to help change their diapers and rock them to sleep; he has spent so much time watching them nurse that he's now a fully qualified lactation consultant. He cheers us on ("Good job Violet, good job Mama!" "Babies growing!"). The most fascinating thing he has ever seen is when I hand express some milk into Violet's mouth to keep her awake. He desperately wants to help accomplish this feat, which should make for a few interesting therapy sessions twenty years from now.

I really need to get a picture of him holding one of the babies. He looks so proud. And huge. How is it that toddlers triple in size when they have a newborn sibling?

voila! kitchen laundry bag

2009-11-02T13:59:00.001-05:00

I make a lot of stuff, but most of it doesn't wind up making much of a quality of life difference for me or anybody else. For example, the bath mat? Nobody cares. Everybody was perfectly happy using a wadded up towel. My adorable coasters? The coaster-phobes in my life continue to use kitchen rags.

But this, this thing of wonder, this laundry bag: it has changed our lives. We finally, finally, finally have a place to put our used napkins, rags, dish cloths, handkerchiefs, tea towels, etc. A pile of dirty laundry sitting on the counter is not conducive to anybody's happiness (except the ants). It's enough to make me want to go back to using paper towels and all the other disposable stuff. Also, having a clearly designated place for dirty kitchen laundry makes it easier for other people to actually help out with meals and cleaning, which is especially nice if you happen to spend all day nursing newborns. For example.

Also, everything in my damn house is gray-brown and/or white, with odd patches of dusty moss green. I'm kind of thrilled by the idea of having something colorful in the kitchen. Yellow is really doing it for me lately. I've found that adding lots of linen makes bright colors a lot more palatable to me (and sort of coordinates with the greigeness of the rest of the house).

PS I finished the inside seams of the bag with bias tape, just for the added thrill.

two

2009-10-31T17:23:00.000-04:00

The strangest part about being pregnant with twins is that when it's all over

you get two newborns. Crazy.

Meet Harry

and Violet

They were born Wednesday night, weighing in at over five pounds each. They both were born hungry and alert, and we all came home yesterday with clean bills of health.

Three things:
1. I can't quite tell who's who in the top picture either.
2. I wrote Thursday's post on Wednesday and posted it in the future, without knowing I was going to be in the hospital having babies.
3. I'm going to write up the birth story as soon as I have two free hands.

coasters & craft books

2009-10-30T15:16:00.000-04:00

I'm sort of in love with these coasters. I love things that are house-shaped, but it's how you can tuck your spoon into the little door pocket that kills me. I also appreciate being able to use up random scraps of fabric.

The pattern is from this book:

I made a few minor changes: the original doesn't call for any topstitching, but it's my experience that things launder a lot better when they're topstitched. Also, the pattern has you hand sew the window appliques (actually, reverse appliques) but there's no way that's going to stand up to the laundry. Washability is a key factor in this house. As I think I've written before, it's either washable or it's garbage.

The gray felt squirrel-shaped tea cozy on the cover of the book has me wishing I could come up with a vaguely plausible need for a tea cozy, but we are sadly a boil-the-water-in-the-microwave type of household.

table runner

2009-10-29T16:06:00.000-04:00

I decided we needed some kind of table runner because
1) the table looks naked
2) I'm getting a little nervous about pitchers and that sort of thing scratching or otherwise ruining the table
3) I forgot that I had meant to make a bunch of trivets, which are what we really need.

Anyway. It's the ubiquitous linen paired with squares of my favorite color combination: gray-brown, aqua, and lime-ish green. I picked out these fabrics during my nesting visit to the fabric store without having any idea what I was going to do with them. I just picked one pile that seemed to coordinate, and that became this table runner, and another pile that worked together, which became a bunch of stuff for the kitchen. And I still have a lot left over from both piles, because fat quarters are always bigger than I think.

After piecing the top, I top stitched the seams, then backed it with some upholstery weight fabric (turned and top stitched). I considered doing more quilting or adding batting (to make it more heat & spill resistant) but I didn't want it to look like an odd-shaped quilt plopped down in the middle of the table.

house pocket and some efforts at organization

2009-10-28T21:19:00.000-04:00

I made this little house months ago (it's patchwork, applique, and embroidery living together in harmony), but only got around to figuring out what to do with it. Now it's a little wall pocket type thing that lives on our refrigerator to hold all the crap that would ordinarily be spread out all over the surface of the fridge: contact numbers, coupons I'll never use, the dogs' vaccination schedule, etc.

Scott and I are not naturally organized. He belongs to the "spread all your crap over any available surface" school of thought, and I belong to the "pile it up in baskets until you have a panic attack when you can't find your social security card" school of thought. This blackboard and the little house pocket are part of an effort for us to keep track of some stuff--grocery lists, reminders, that sort of thing.

While I'm on the subject, let me say how much I love the chalkboard paint. It was so easy to put up--I think it was two light coats. I also know that it's easy to paint over because I dripped a lot and got a chance to do some serious damage control. We also painted some on the living room wall for Joseph, which has been predictably fun and messy. I really hope chalk isn't carcinogenic.

bath mat

2009-10-27T22:52:00.001-04:00

Why did it take me so long to realize the beauty of square patchwork? It's so damn easy and it looks much fresher than I would have thought. I think that it might be boring to work a huge project entirely in square patches, but it's very satisfying for tiny projects like this bath mat and the laundry bags I've been making.

This mat is destined for the yellow-walled "guest" bathroom, which is in fact used by everybody except me, because I have taken over the master bathroom in perpetuity (thank you, husband, for allowing this).

Of course, my cheerful new bathmat is making the rest of the bathroom look like a prison cell. I want to do something to brighten up the rest of the room. Colored towels are usually not allowed in my home because I find them incredibly depressing (don't ask) but now I wonder whether colored towels could be worse than dingy "white" towels. I also want a fancy shower curtain, although I'm not sure how to make that happen without it being too mold-friendly (although.... hmmm)

The how: the top is just three inch squares. I laid it face down on an old towel, stitched around the perimeter, turned & topstitched. Then I quilted in the ditch horizontally. It was easy, but the towel shifted weirdly while I was quilting it, almost like it was stretching. So there are some lumps at the edges. It's not a big deal, but next time I'll probably assemble it a little differently to avoid this problem.

smock of questionable aesthetic

2009-10-26T14:44:00.002-04:00

I've made this smock at least twice before as presents, but this is the first time I've made one for Joseph. Of course truck fabric was requested. I'm really not quite sure that this is what Amy Karol had in mind when she designed the pattern.
This is also the first time I've used store-bought bias tape in a long long time. I forgot how much easier it is to work with than handmade tape. This is a crushing blow. The packaged stuff is just more uniform and the folds are crisper. Perhaps if I got that snazzy bias tape machine my own humble product could compare??
After I finished making the smock (with Joseph helping every step of the way) he demanded to wear it. So he spent the morning wearing nothing but a diaper and a smock. The only way I could convince him to get dressed was to swear a blood oath that he could put the smock on over his clothes. So this is how we spent the rest of the day.

not useless after all

2009-10-25T14:37:00.000-04:00

Last week we (finally) brought all the baby things out of the garage. Joseph was fascinated by the co-sleeper. The same co-sleeper that he found intolerably insulting and oppressive as an infant. I think he has slept in it for a total of two hours in his entire life.
Anyway, upon seeing it now, he promptly climbed into the bottom (storage) compartment, which has become his little office. He gets in and starts demanding that we zip it up, which is a little disturbing for me, but he loves it. He brings in his toys and tells them to sleep. It's very sweet. I think he's going to be disappointed when he discovers that the boring old babies sleep in the top.

a vest (or, knitting is magic)

2009-10-24T14:22:00.001-04:00

I made this vest as part of Joseph's holiday finery. I'm really amazed when I follow a pattern that seems entirely composed of reasonable, easy-enough steps, but at the end I get a result that blows my mind. The pattern was easy to follow, and cables turn out to be no big deal, yet I feel like such a hot shot for having made a real live cable knit vest. This is why people knit--all you have to learn is a few basic movements and all of a sudden you can transform a tangle of sheep hair into something complex.

The color is totally off in these pictures. It's more of an olive green.

As soon as the temperature goes back below 70, he's wearing this at least three times a week.

laundry bag

2009-10-23T14:21:00.000-04:00

In a craft-related moment of clarity, I realized that what this household needs is not another bed-sized quilt, but rather a few smaller and more utilitarian items, namely:

a laundry bag for Joseph's room, so he can put away his own dirty clothes and feel that toddler-specific sense of accomplishment in doing things the rest of us consider chores
a laundry bag for the kitchen, in which to toss used handkerchiefs, rags, towels, and all the other non-disposable items I feel so smug about using, except when they constitute a pile of filth on my counter
a few bath mats, floor mats, door mats, etc.
a table runner, coasters, place mats, etc.

With that in mind, I've begun cutting into the pile of fabric I had been hording for various (imaginary) Big Projects.

The first result is this laundry bag for Joseph's room.

I had intended to use most of this fabric to make Joseph his own roads quilt, but I seriously lack the ambition. There are bikes, jump ropes, boats, and (of course) trucks. The trucks come courtesy of some Japanese fabric I bought from Purl, and which is definitely Kokka or Trefle or something, but which I can't find anymore on their website or anywhere else on the internet. In case you're wondering, scouring the internet for fabric that doesn't seem to exist is a great way to kill 45 minutes and lose your mind at the same time.

The construction: after I assembled the patchwork top (4 inch squares, arranged 5 up and 16 across), I backed it with white cotton canvas and then quilted the crap out of it with horizontal lines 1/4" apart. The canvas and the dense quilting help it keep its shape, which is good because a floppy bag hanging from a door knob is 1) ugly and 2) hard for little hands to reach into.

I'm very pleased with how this turned out. I like the blue and red fabrics paired with linen and the solid gray-blue. I really like the horizontal quilting. This is one of those rare instances where I was able to actually execute my vision. I'm definitely making one for the kitchen, colors TBD.

cervix watch 2009

2009-10-22T12:00:00.008-04:00

I can't decide whether it's in really poor taste to write about one's cervix on the interwebs.

In the last few months I've discussed that part of my body with total strangers. And my parents. Is it dilated? Funneling? Short? Long? Changing? High, low, thick, thin, hard, soft, etc. Six weeks of bed rest and (alleged) preterm labor can't really be discussed without mentioning the cervix, so by now I don't have any boundary issues. Cervix cervix cervix! Say it loud and there's music playing...

So. Yesterday the fetuses and I went to the doctor where we learned that I'm 4 cm dilated and very effaced. Doctor thinks it likely that the babies will be born in the next week. So, naturally, I think to myself, "I really ought to go to the fabric store."

Naturally.

There are only 700 tons of laundry sitting in my roach-infested garage, waiting to turn into mildewy rags. There are exactly zero frozen meals for us to eat after I come home with the babies. My hospital bag remains empty, except for some yarn, a pair of tweezers, and a book about breastfeeding multiples. My house is in an unprecedented state of squalor. None of these situations are likely to resolve themselves, and are even less likely to be resolved by anybody I might happen to be married to.

But to the fabric store I went, and $45 dollars worth of fat quarters later I felt like my nesting urges were totally fulfilled. I am completely ready to have these babies.

I seriously think that when the time comes, I might post photographs of the fabric instead of the babies.

BIG

2009-10-21T11:56:00.001-04:00

In case you're wondering, this is what being 35 weeks pregnant with twins looks like. If you're wondering what it feels like, try fracturing your pelvis and having a slipped disk. Then take all your internal organs and squash them into something the size of a pez dispenser. That will give you an inkling.

The reason I cropped out my face is because I am not smiling. The reason I left in my dog's butt is because that seems totally appropriate to my mood.

Don't get me wrong, I'm really really happy that I'm still pregnant and that we've made it nearly to term. Six weeks ago I was very worried about having two very tiny sick babies. Now it looks like they'll be about five or six pounds each, which is pretty respectable for twins. What I'd like to know is how ten pounds of baby required me to inflate to the size of a futon.

zippy sweater

2009-10-20T13:13:00.001-04:00

It's under 70 degrees in lovely north Florida, which means only one thing: bust out the woolens. I finished knitting this zip up hoodie just in time for our bracing winter season. It's a little big on him, but there's no way I'm spending a month knitting something that can only be worn for one year. No sir.

I feel like the hood needs a pom pom or something. While my kid still tolerates being dressed like a gnome, I am not passing up any opportunity for gnomification.

Attaching a zipper to a knit is a pain in the rear. I'm not 100% thrilled with how this zipper looks, but I can live with it. My only advice is to keep the stitch length long for easy unpicking, use lots of pins, and--this is the key--close the zipper before attaching it to the second side (that will help you keep things lined up, which is key where stripes are involved). Also, it's apparently impossible to shorten a separating zipper.

This is the pattern, but I did the hood my own way to boost the elf factor and maintain the stripe sequence.
This is the yarn (very good price, let's hope it doesn't scratch/pill/felt too much).

doll quilt

2009-10-19T13:52:00.000-04:00

Joseph needed a blanket so that the dozens of toys in his crib could be properly put to bed. I thought this would be a way to use up some of my random blue scraps but it barely made a dent. Why do I have so much blue fabric? I don't even like blue.

Anyway, 2 inch squares, patched together, backed in some truck and train fabrics (because everything has to have a truck on it these days, okay?), quilted in the ditch, and bound with more blue scraps. Now I kind of understand why people get all into making doll quilts. It's totally on a manageable scale.

Two more things:

This seems like a pretty slick way to piece together tiny squares; I will have to try it out when I grow up enough to use interfacing.
This is the most inspiring assortment of doll quilts.

happyish

2009-10-18T16:45:00.000-04:00

After an especially stressful morning involving one of my dogs attacking the other dog (again), and the ensuing horrible decision-making process which I'm sure I'll get into here once I stop hating myself, I am focusing on trying to be peaceful. Calm. Zen. In that spirit, this is a list of easily accessible things that make me happy, or at least prevent a seriously bad day from becoming stratospherically awful.

A long hot shower with nice-smelling soap. The more expensive the soap, the better.
Broadway show stoppers, belted out shamelessly. By me and only me. I truly hate when other people sing show tunes, or pretty much anything else for that matter. This would be hypocritical but for the fact that I only sing at home, alone, with the shades drawn.
Essential oils in the laundry. We use some very virtuous, additive-free, earthy-friendly laundry detergent, and sometimes it leaves our clothes smelling a bit disappointing. Some lavender essential oil in the fabric softener dispenser solves that problem and also makes my whole garage smell nice, almost like a place that doesn't harbor colonies of vermin.
Tea.
Take out.
New fabric or yarn. It's amazing how much distraction you can buy for under $20.
Long walks. Preferably by my own damn self, thank you very much, but my husband and kid are okay too.
Organizing my closet.
Making something. Dinner, a sweater, some coasters. I think it's a very primitive response to the mystery of creating something out of nothing, but making stuff usually takes the edge of a bad mood for me. Of course the correlative is that when a project doesn't work out, I feel rotten.

That's enough to work with. Now I'm going to make some tea and sing flamboyantly.

be still my heart

2009-10-17T13:46:00.000-04:00

A bias tape making machine :

The catch is that it's $90 and you have to buy different tips to make different size bias tapes. If it were $30 and came with a bunch of tips, we'd have a deal.

SANTA, ARE YOU PAYING ATTENTION?

(my husband is santa.)

pile of rags (magic!)

2009-10-16T17:24:00.001-04:00

This week's obsessive nesting project: diaper inserts! I had already made a boatload of pocket diapers, all of which needed inserts (i.e., something absorbent to stick inside them). In an ideal world, you use super-absorbent microfiber inserts. In my world, you scour your house in search of every unwanted piece of of vaguely absorbent and soft fabric to cut up and sew into rectangles.

A bunch of my husband's undershirts mysteriously committed suicide at the same time, so that was convenient. I also cannibalized a lot of my nightclothes, having decided that I am a grown woman who no longer needs to sleep in bleach-stained t-shirts and body-hating yoga pants. Then I cut up some yardage of hideous lime green cotton pique that I bought to make Joseph a golf shirt which he has worn twice, under duress.

Here's the neat part: instead of sewing the fabric into proper diaper inserts (about six layers thick and probably about 10" x 4") I cut them into 8 x 11 rectangles which can be folded to be the right size and thickness for diaper inserts, and can also be used as tiny newborn-sized prefold-type diapers, with another folded rectangle in the middle for absorbency.

See? I think these will fit better than the infant prefolds we have left over from Joseph.

An added bonus is that the same rectangles, folded up, function as both diaper doublers for older babies and as inserts for the ten million postpartum pads I made myself (free tutorial here!). And they'll dry faster than a thicker, multi-layered piece of fabric.

To recap: this is what I have accomplished

inserts for the newborn diapers
doublers for the bigger diapers
prefold-ish newborn diapers for using under covers
pad inserts for me
everything dries quickly
my husband's nightshirts do not need to go to the landfill
no more hideous nightclothes for me

Awesome.

best $20 ever spent

2009-10-15T11:44:00.017-04:00

I treated myself to the Knit Picks ornament kit: 6 skeins of fingering weight wool yarn, plus a booklet of ornament patterns. Just the addition of six skeins of yarn to my life is a thrill worth more than $20, and not just for me: Joseph has been using them as blocks, pillows, rocks, whatever.

These lights used up only a tiny amount of yarn. It looks like there's more than enough yarn in the kit to outfit several trees in lights, balls, garlands, candy canes, birds, pickles, etc. This will probably satisfy my holiday-crafting needs for quite a while.

All the ornaments are knit using size 2 needles, which is a bit of a headache, but it's not like I'm knitting a sweater or a blanket. The ornaments work up fast enough because they're super tiny: each "light" is only about an inch long.

Of course the real attraction is that hand knit ornaments are more child-safe than your usual ornaments--nothing to choke, stab, electrocute, or otherwise injure a busy toddler.

Next up is a cranberry & popcorn garland. Whee!

Mr. Fox

2009-10-14T17:21:00.001-04:00

We were freaking thrilled to discover Mr. Fox at our door yesterday.

The lovely and talented Annie (of Bird and Little Bird) sent him our way to add a bit of sunshine. He's gorgeous. I'm always so impressed when I see serious craftsmanship and attention to detail and wonderful materials all put together. Joseph is smitten. The dogs are on notice that if Mr. Fox is in any way harmed, he will be replaced by an extremely realistic stuffed lab or terrier mix.

internet tag

2009-10-13T13:35:00.000-04:00

Just in time to save me from having to find something to write about (NaBloWriMo has me scraping the bottom of my mental barrel) Jen has tagged me to answer this questionnaire. The rule is that you have to use one word answers.

Where is your cell phone? here

Your hair? neglected

Your mother? babysitting

Your father? helping

Your favorite food? cheese

Your dream last night? unremarkable

Your favorite drink? chai

Your dream/goal? self-sufficiency

What room are you in? bedroom

Your hobby? making

Your fear? chaos

Where do you want to be in 6 years? here

Where were you last night? bed

Something you aren’t? impulsive

Muffins? definitely

Wish list item? serger

Where did you grow up? NJ

Last thing you did? knit

What are you wearing? dress

Your TV? appreciated

Your pets? silly

Your friends? generous

Your life? lucky

Your mood? cranky

Missing someone? nope

Vehicle? cramped

Something you’re not wearing? shoes

Your favorite store? Anthropologie?

Your favorite color? green

When was the last time you laughed? today

Last time you cried? today

Your best friend? husband

One place that I go over and over? Target

One person who emails me regularly? Mom

Favorite place to eat? home

I'm supposed to tag six bloggers, but you should go ahead and consider yourself tagged if you need subject matter for a blog post, especially if you're doing NaBloWriMo.

rescued t-shirt

2009-10-12T15:18:00.000-04:00

While I was digging through our box of stuff that's destined for Goodwill, I came across this shirt. I had rejected it because of the pointless and ugly sports logo that was emblazoned on it. I decided to try rescuing it by covering the logo with a patch made from some of our ubiquitous truck fabric. Voila! No more ugly shirt, hello "mama made dump truck shirt." Since Joseph requests a truck shirt every day, I plan to dig deeper into our Goodwill box in search of more dumb shirts to make over.

I ironed on the patch using double sided fusible web (heat'n'bond lite) and then secured it with a somewhat tight zigzag stitch. The edges are a bit frayed after several washings; the fraying could be avoided by using a super tight zigzag stitch, but I didn't want it to look to perfect--I wanted this patch to look patchy, not like a very slick applique.

treasure bag

2009-10-11T18:57:00.000-04:00

This little bag is for Joseph to put all his important objects into; it was inspired by a project in Handmade Home. It's just the right size (8.5"x11", imagine that) for a toddler to gather rocks from the neighbors' gardens, or to carry around a tambourine to which he has suddenly become very attached, or to pretend to carry groceries in, or whatever. It's the same linen I used in the toy bags, and the pocket and straps are made from the same fabric that I used in the sling because vehicles are the source of much joy in our home these days.

Joseph seems kind of underwhelmed by it, to be honest. I can't predict what will strike his fancy. It turns out that scraps of fabric that I was too lazy to carry over to the trash can are perfect blankets for his truck collection, whereas painstakingly crafted stuffed animals are neglected. Happily, he's going through a phase where he really enjoys "mama made" clothing, so that's gratifying.

do not expect any coherence here

2009-10-10T19:01:00.000-04:00

A few days ago I called it quits with the bed rest but since I'm slow, achy, tired, cranky and hot I'm not good for much other than sitting very very still, directly under the fan. It's still too hot in Florida to even consider venturing outside.

Actually, I'm in a crappy mood. It's the usual late pregnancy aches, pains, and insanity, combined with the lurking fear that this could continue for eight more weeks, end in a very negative medical experience, and be followed by months of intense sleep deprivation. Just to give you an idea of how delightful I am to be around, today I punished a misbehaving smoke detector by beating it to death with a frying pan. Then, when my sewing machine started misbehaving (always a surefire insanity trigger) I cried myself sick.

Here's a brief list of things that have been keeping me out of jail:

DVDs. In particular True Blood. I'm a terrible reviewer, so I'll let the facts speak for themselves: when the final DVD of season 1 got stuck in the older and crappier of our two DVD players, I didn't hesitate for one second before prying it open using a knitting needle. I needed to watch that DVD.
Organic junk food. It turns out that gummy bears don't give me heartburn. This alone is a reason to eat bags of them a day. Chocolate covered almonds do give me heartburn, but this isn't stopping me.
Craft books. I have a pile by my bedside that I plan to write about once I can put together a complete thought. Which will not be today.

sling

2009-10-09T12:54:00.000-04:00

I made this sling for Joseph following the instructions in my new favorite crafting book. Damn easy. This amused Joseph for minutes, I tell you.

You will notice that two babies are being carried in this sling, as well as a bulldozer which you can't see. I take this to mean that I will have no trouble jamming two newborns into my own pouch sling. At some point I'm going to have to graduate to a more versatile baby carrier (probably a wrap) in order to wear them both at the same time, but while they are still slingable, they will be slung. I have no idea how to parent an infant without just wearing it all day and I hope I don't ever have to figure this out. Back pain is a fair price to pay for being able to empty the dishwasher without being screamed at by two (two!) babies.

below the belt

2009-10-08T10:33:00.000-04:00

I've had a few very good mail days lately: craft books from Amazon, yarn from KnitPicks, a much-anticipated box of goodies from Purl...and a shipment of flag-sized underwear from Hanes. To cover my flag-sized arse, that is. My excellent husband has tried to tell me that it's my hips, not my butt, that's expanding, but I call this splitting hairs.

For those who are especially keen on the topic of pregnancy & undergarments, this is absolutely the last (and funniest) word on the subject.

To keep with the general tenor of this post, today my OB informed me that I would have to wear a surgical cap while giving birth because of something about hair interfering with the ventilation system in the operating room (and the hospital's policy is that multiples have to be born in the OR). I laughed my (flag-sized) ass off and pointed out that, pardon me, some hair does tend to get exposed during childbirth. She was not amused. I, however, was. I'm beginning to think that I should approach these logic-defying hospital policies as pure comedy, and then proceed to ignore them.

new diapers, crappy pictures

2009-10-07T07:04:00.000-04:00

New diaper covers!

This one is just red PUL bound with fold over elastic. I cut out the PUL using basically the same template as for all the diapers I've made, bound it with FOE, then stitched on some velcro. That's it, easy peasy. Since both the PUL and the FOE are stretchy, the cover itself is stretchy, which makes for a nice trim fit.

This one is the same idea, but with a layer of cotton fabric layered on top of the PUL. I used a glue stick to paste the two layers together before sewing on the FOE, that way I didn't need to poke pinholes holes into the PUL. The cotton fish fabric isn't stretchy, so this cover isn't as trim as the red one, but it provides some much needed variety.

If it weren't for the fact that I am the only person in this family who is not completely unmanned by the prospect of having to use a prefold or fitted diaper as well as a cover, I would scrap all the pocket diapers I've been making in favor of these little covers.

Handmade Home

2009-10-06T11:16:00.000-04:00

I usually avoid buying craft books because they either

are filled with projects I wouldn't need instructions to make,
focus on projects that look like they came from a big box store, or
embrace an aesthetic that has no place outside a 1990 craft fair; this is especially true of books geared towards crafting for kids.

But this book is making me very happy:

There is not a single project in there that tries to replicate something you could buy at WalMart or BabiesRUs. The aesthetic is deliberately handmade, thrifted, simple and natural. Best of all, hardly any interfacing is called for (because seriously, why take beautiful natural materials and crap them up with nasty stiff interfacing? I HATE INTERFACING.)

Handmade Home is now sitting next to my bed, exploding with post it flags. I desperately need to cut up some ugly old towels in order to make a bath mat; then I have a bunch of pouches and wall pockets and bags to make for my boy. This book has me seriously considering making cloth maxi pads. Yes, I just said that on the internet.

Loads more inspiration from the book here.

toy bags & a new book

2009-10-05T13:09:00.000-04:00

I made these little drawstring bags to corral toys that have multiple parts. That way the red choo choo can be found immediately and maybe we don't have to throw a tantrum. Also, since the bags are labeled with (approximate) pictures of their contents, it's easier for everybody to find and put away toys. Theoretically.

These were so easy to make that I feel silly for not having made them months ago. They aren't even lined. For each bag I just sewed together two pieces of linen, each 8.5"x11" (why that size? Because the ruler and the cutting mat were all the way in the kitchen, whereas a stack of printer paper was right next to my bed, that's why). I used this tutorial for the drawstring casing, and I'm pretty sure I initially got the idea for labeled toy bags here. So far I've only made bags for the train set and the finger puppet set, but more are in the works.

The idea for the little circular patches came from Bend the Rules with Fabric. It was so easy that I now plan to sew circular patches onto everything that sits still. I used Heat'n'Bond lite (which does not fall under my blanket ban on interfacing) to iron them on and then I used a zig-zag stitch around the edges.

BTRWF also has me convinced that freezer paper stencilling is not outside my crafting comfort zone, and is making me wish I felt confident enough to dye fabric. But I'm still concerned that troubling chemicals + my total lack of attention to detail = ER visit. This book has also made me reconsider those pieces of fabric you can print a picture onto; I had previously though they were unforgivably cheesy with no possible application to my life, but then I saw this project adapted from the book and I am in love. Joseph needs T-shirts with pictures of all his animal friends. That is a fact.

NaBloWriMo

2009-10-04T09:55:00.000-04:00

My shockingly frequent posts of late are because I'm participating in NaBloWriMo : the idea is that you post every day for the month of October. I'm doing this because:

I like to write but I have trouble getting motivated
I'm bored
I like showing off the crap I make and getting complimented on it (sad but true)
If I don't post for a day it will serve as a de facto birth announcement

I've been enjoying checking out the other bloggers who are doing this--nobody signs up for this sort of thing without being a pretty decent writer. I'm already a dedicated reader of Irregular Tammie and Bird and Little Bird, and now there are a few more I'm going to have to add to my Google Reader subscriptions. And then I will update my links sidebar. Now we're getting ambitious.

bed

2009-10-03T10:56:00.001-04:00

Three weeks of bed rest down, less than three more to go. At that point I'll be 35 weeks pregnant and the coast will be clear for the babies to arrive.

You can tell he's sleeping because his eyes are shut, of course.

And yes, that is a bulldozer that he has tucked in bed beside him.

It hasn't been nearly as bad as I had thought. I get to spend all day watching DVDs and knitting. Sometimes my parents (who are now settled in town, hooray!) take Joseph for the entire day. A bunch of amazing women from a moms' group I belong to have been bringing us dinner. I feel like I'm on some kind of crazy retreat.

So far, the only real problem I've had is that I miss my little boy. There's only so much interaction you can have with an energetic two year old when you're stuck in one place. It's frustrating not being able to hang out with him the way we ordinarily do--playdates, errands, cooking, puttering, etc. That said, life as we knew it was going to be temporarily suspended anyway once the babies were born, so it's probably best that we all begin this transition while nobody is sleep-deprived or hormonally fraught.

in which I find out how big a queen sized quilt really is

2009-10-02T07:26:00.003-04:00

I started this quilt last summer (i.e., August of 2008) after we painted the spare room an especially obnoxious shade of orange. My goal was to tone down the orange walls by making a quilt that combined orange with a boatload of white and green. In my universe, white and green = calm, soothing, peaceful. Orange is a color for people who are better adjusted than I am.

Sadly, I had underestimated the amount of work that goes into making a queen sized quilt, utterly lost interest in ever seeing it completed, and became well and truly disgusted by every inch of fabric I had chosen. Meanwhile, we painted over the orange walls.

But last month, in a burst of pregnancy-related nesting, I finished the quilting, and then I finished hand sewing the binding during the first week of bed rest.

Now that it's done I kind of love it. I think it helps that I quilted the crap out of it: I think my quilting lines are only an inch and a half apart. Even fabrics that probably have no business being near one another look perfect when they're smothered by miles of quilting.

But my favorite part is the backing: it's an old white sheet on which I appliqued some leaf shapes. I'm pleasantly surprised that the white quilting lines don't seem too obvious on the brown leaves.

knitting for sanity, part 2

2009-10-01T08:49:00.000-04:00

I'm not as happy with this version of the Debbie Bliss baby shrug as I was with my last effort. Unless I am badly misremembering the anatomy of a six month old, I fear there will be bagginess/sloppiness issues, and that the solution would have been a button.

Furthermore, the seaming was murder and it looks like crap, and I had a really hard time picking up stitches to do the ribbed border--you really have to pick up a ton of stitches when you're working the outside of a curve, but you need to pick up much fewer on the inside of a curve. Otherwise you wind up with a drooping, puckering mess. It took several tries to get it reasonably right.

The yarn is (once again) Knit Picks Comfy Worsted, which I could not love more even if I tried.

But wait! What is that lovely piece of quilted gorgeousness under the baby sweater? Stay tuned!

knitting for sanity, part 1

2009-09-28T19:21:00.000-04:00

If it is possible to delay labor simply by ignoring contractions and focusing on yarn overs, then that's exactly what I've been doing. I figure that if I'm supposed to be on bed rest, I may as well knit my little heart out since that's pretty much the only productive thing you can do in a semi-recumbent position (crying and bossing people around being less than productive). So that's how I've spent the past two weeks: knitting through every scrap of yarn in the house.

This baby cardigan was a very fast and easy knit. It was brainless enough to complete during the initial fog of medicine and panic. My only issue is that my gauge must have been even weirder than usual because the sweater looks like it would fit a very robust two year old, which is a bit bigger than I had anticipated.

I'm enjoying how the (very basic) lace pattern makes this cardigan look a bit like my Liesl.

The pattern is available free here, which I would totally recommend to any beginning/intermediate knitter.
The yarn is comfy worsted from knitpicks, which washes so damn well I couldn't be happier with it.

Next up, more baby sweaters!

what I did at the hospital

2009-09-12T20:52:00.000-04:00

So me and the fetuses have had a bit of a wild ride over the past few days. First a pig flu scare, then a rapidly vanishing cervix, and then contractions that were coming too frequently. The result (of the latter two events, at least) was a day and a half at the hospital. Right now I'm on bed rest and I have pills to stop the contractions, and I have every reason to believe that the babies are going to stay put for several weeks longer. But...I've never been in the hospital overnight before, so this was a bit of an experience.

I'm in the midst of writing a 12,000 page disquisition on the importance of wearing your own underwear at the hospital (something about maintaining the integrity of the self in a bureaucratic/institutional setting, blah blah), but in the meantime I thought I would share my observations about life on the inside:

In the hospital there is something called "shower privileges," which I apparently did not have. My solution was simply to stand in the middle of the bathroom and dump water over myself until I felt clean. This made me feel all dark and rebellious, and also clean.
On a related note, you are not going to get arrested for unplugging your IV and other tubes. I'm all about going to the bathroom by myself and I was not letting seventeen wires stand in my way.
Because of pig flu hysteria, kids under age 5 are currently not allowed to visit patients at any hospitals in Jacksonville. I pretty much lost my marbles when I discovered this.
The nurses automatically offer you Ambien. At least, they automatically offered me Ambien. Whether they were motivated by the fact that I had just spent three hours openly weeping about not being able to see my son, I could not tell you.
If you keep asking the same question to different people ("when can I go home?" "when is the doctor coming?" "is this medicine actually actually reducing the contractions and if not why do I have to stay here?" "what happens to my babies if they're born right this minute [hysterical sobbing]") you will never get the same answer twice. It's kind of fantastic, in a zen-mindfulness way: you can keep asking, but you will never be answered.
The next time I have to stay at the hospital (which depends on whether my uterus freaks out again) I am bringing DVDs. If you do not enjoy judge shows, the 700 Club, or PBS pledge drives, hospital television does not have much to offer.

To be fair, absolutely everybody I encountered in the hospital was amazingly nice. And patient. And very skilled at dealing with hysterical patients. I have zero complaints on that front. It's just the institutional setting that gets me kooky. On an intellectual level, I realize that the maternity ward is not the same as a Soviet work camp, and that obstetrics is not entirely an evil cartel, but certain parts of my brain beg to differ.

crayon wallet, take two...

2009-09-10T12:42:00.000-04:00

...or, what your kid is getting if you invite us to a birthday party.

I've been really determined to get this right because crayon wallets/rolls/cases are such a great go-to gift for toddlers and preschoolers. I especially like the wallet concept because you can stuff the pouch with stickers, which seems to make everything right in the world of a toddler (and if stickers don't work, try a glycerin suppository--for the toddler).

My first effort at a crayon wallet was too floppy; serviceable, but a little flimsy. This time I made the wallet bigger--three panels instead of two--in order to fit the sixteen-pack of big toddler-friendly crayons. The extra panel seems to have solved some of the flimsiness/floppiness problems of the earlier version. Another factor is that the blue twill I used here is a lot heavier than what I used last time.

Do you think I'm every going to run out of that fish fabric (originally a Target sheet)? If so, it isn't happening any time soon.

I feel like I'm on the road to crayon wallet perfection, or at least adequacy. Perfection would require interfacing (instead of a layer of batting), which I will have no part of. Interfacing just gives me the heebee jeebees, I can't even attempt to explain why.

play sushi

2009-09-02T16:47:00.000-04:00

At long last: nine sets of knit sushi for a playfood swap I'm doing with some crafty local mothers.

Salmon rolls, California rolls, and pickled ginger. Wasabi seemed like a choking hazard, so I didn't make any. Soy sauce and chop sticks also not included.

I used this pattern and scraps of wool and cotton yarn. The pattern is really an excellent stash-buster--it calls for fingering weight yarn but you can swap in heavier or lighter yarn as long as you accomodate by increasing or decreasing stitches accordingly.

Next time I attempt a project like this I need to make something simpler (pancakes?) because this took way too freaking long. This project lasted at least eight netflix (a legitimate unit of time in my world).

things I have been doing to be less crazy

2009-08-27T14:14:00.000-04:00

I veer between punch-the-wall anger, blissed-out dopeyness, and open weeping. Thank you, hormones. I remember this happening at the very end of my first pregnancy, but this time I suppose it's coming sooner because of all the extra twin-related hormones. The solution for a normal person would probably be to exercise but I'm now supposed to be "resting as much as possible" so the babies don't accidentally get themselves born too soon. There are so many things I could say about the silliness of telling the mother of a toddler to "rest" but I will leave that up to your imagination.

So this is what I've been doing to achieve whatever mental stability I might be capable of at the moment:

Scott now takes Joseph out on Saturday mornings so I can clean the bathrooms. There is something about a clean bathroom that I find very soothing, so this has been good from a mood-stability standpoint. It also means that I could probably take a bath without catching anything. If I can still fit in the tub, that is.
I let Joseph do pretty much whatever he wants as long as it won't hurt him. Putting makeup on the dog? Fine. Distributing hundreds of baby wipes around the house? Super. Insisting on complete nudity at all times? Great idea, wish I'd thought of it myself.
We bought three new hampers so I can partially satisfy my laundry-sorting obsession (complete satisfaction would involve about six color-coded hampers and a label maker). This is a huge improvement over the perpetually overflowing, unventilated, rusting, mildewy, bug-harboring Ikea trash bin. If only I could figure out a sorting strategy that involves no more than three piles (whites, colors, and delicates, maybe?).

I've also been sewing a lot, but there's a limit to how often you can post about homemade cloth dipaers and little baby dresses.

a completed Liesl

2009-08-18T19:26:00.000-04:00

This sweater--made from the justly famous Liesl pattern--is a knitting first for me: something that I can actually envision buying in a store. The color may be bland but it matches all the other dirt-colored things in my wardrobe. It also is the first pattern I actually paid for. The thick yarn (KnitPicks Shine Worsted) and huge needles make it a satisfyingly fast knit. Also, it wasn't hard, once I realized that I had to pay attention to the stitch count instead of just watching the Netflix and hoping for the best. I'll definitely knit this again (already bought the yarn, actually) but I'll make the sleeves longer.

I had Scott take these pictures because tripods and toddlers don't mix. We don't have full length mirrors in our house (for some very good psychological reasons, such as the fact that full length mirrors stop me from eating lunch, if you get what I mean) so I'm not used to seeing my new expanded dimensions. Whenever I get a glimpse of myself I really can't imagine how I'm going to make it three more months. All of my internal organs have already been displaced by baby limbs (at the last ultrasound there were four feet lined up against my rib cage) so I imagine that the only place to grow is out. Troubling thought.

P.S. Yes that is a giant stain on my dress. I have nothing to offer in my defense.